it’s weird when you first realize that there are people that are younger than you are.
…that’s a lie.
it’s completely normal when you first realize that there are people that are younger than you are. normal when you realize that there is like a entire generation, maybe, that is ‘youth’ rendering you ‘sort of adult’.
it’s not the knowing; it’s the feeling… the getting or something… it’s not so much the realization that there is this baracade beneath you that has been raised in a way that you and your peers categorically weren’t.
I’m not even old. it’s just… i think i feel something different now.
you’re reckless and young and it’s grand.
you continue life… young and grand and reckless.
maybe a bit less young. less reckless… “I used to be really crazy, et al.”
still reckless. alot less young. less invincible. but never, still, understanding the ‘whole thing’.
nothing has changed.
evolved, maybe. in evolution’s undetectable turtle crawl.
nothing has/had changed.
I learned stuff, yes.
but stayed the same.
and, maybe, now it’s different.
maybe it’s chronological age, maybe its ‘where’s the drugs?’, maybe it’s…
maybe I’m like thinking or feeling or….
all the things that I said that “I don’t understand” to;
maybe now I understand….
and, now… there is no excuse.