Faster, Faster

So the quote goes, “Faster, faster until the thrill  of speed overcomes the fear of death” – HS Thompson.

Upon first reading this, something about it felt so right… so representative of my entire… thing. But somehow skewed or twisted… or backward.

In my experience, it would be “Faster, faster until the fear of death overcomes the thrill of speed”. Hmmm….

So, the Hunter S Thompson thing requires acceleration at an accelerating pace… it begs one to go even further [faster] than they are going right now until they reach that place where one is invincible.

My thing, on the other hand, I suppose is an addicts’ tenant. Its avoidance and denial. It presupposes that one is already there and must go even faster to maintain the fact that this is a thrill. Maintenance.

And though I wrote the above at the end of January, it still applies today. Your author hasn’t written anything, in what seems like not just a pit-stop, but rather a old-age home where she has come to die (sometimes it feels that way)… the aforementioned is a part of it. Usually, my digressions become my entire post… but somehow, now, I don’t know. And thus, anytime the folks at 23rd Street find some inspiration to write anything, they must do it, at that moment… and continue to do it until they burn out.

Its a very small window.

WARNING!!! This is a stupid, desperate and sell-out post. (Not that there was anyone to sell-out to). Don’t read it… really. It was really only my version of “maybe I can write still”. …and, well, the court is still out on that one. But if this were your evidence… the blog would be condemned, boxed and stored somewhere in some part of some imaginary “Writer Crimes Unit” where it would gather dust until it was burned. 

Cognitive dissonance. Whatever. Its not like a new thing here. I write about it all the time. Not that I own cognitive dissonance. But anyway, I feel the my expiration. So, here goes. Again, I hate “In Plain Sight”… in the same manner that I kind of secretly love it. But not really. Ideas are ideas… nobody owns ideas. But I have a history of feeling infringed upon, when someone says something in a work of art, that I have felt somehow was ‘my’ idea.

I’m over it.

Whatever the actual definition of cognitive dissonance, (because they seem to speak of denial here, rather than cognitive dissonance). The end of the following rings true somehow to my current state of affairs.

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